tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26144407871144385242024-02-02T08:18:45.197-05:00The Road Less Travelled . . .The big stuff, the little stuff, & all the stuff in between . . .Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.comBlogger218125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-13466901093190199082014-09-02T18:51:00.000-04:002014-09-02T18:51:43.578-04:00We're moving to BC!<br />
Yup - you read that right.<br />
<br />
We're moving . . . again.<br />
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Yes, we did just move to Port Stanley in March. And yes, we absolutely love it here. Like one of my husband's mentors says though: "you miss 100% of the shots you don't take", and a big opportunity came up for us that we just had to jump on.<br />
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We hadn't been planning on moving anytime soon. Like I said, we LOVE Port Stanley. Seriously, this place has been absolutely amazing in ways I never even expected. It's been beautiful, awe-inspiring, inspirational, and a respite from the busyness of our work lives. It's been small-town living at its finest, and I know I'll always remember this season of our lives with immense fondness. We've also been very blessed in our jobs, and had planned on staying and continuing to work here for a few more years, but a job opportunity came up for Chris that's pretty much his all-time dream job, and it just so happened to be in Victoria, British Columbia.<br />
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When he told me, I immediately got goose bumps and knew this was something he needed to pursue. We knew right away that this job seemed tailor-made for him, and it being in BC was something that made both our hearts start beating faster. For the past several years, living in BC has been on our "bucket list", and it's something that would find its way into conversation every few months. It had always been something that was on our 5 or 10-year plan though - we never imagined that an opportunity would come up for us to live there sooner rather than later!<br />
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But, God's plans are always bigger than our own, and things started to line up to make this a reality for us. Needless to say, he got the job and we'll be moving to BC at the end of September. The company he'll be working for and the work they do is awesome - he'll be working for a not-for-profit organization that takes groups of young people on trips around Vancouver Island on tall ships (they look like pirate ships for you non-boating people) ;) They also do 8-10 month tall ship expeditions to various locations around the world. The youth learn leadership skills, how to overcome their fears, and of course - how to sail! It's a really, amazing organization, and right up Chris' alley.<br />
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It's a pretty quick timeline in terms of us moving there and him starting his new job, but we're both excited for the adventure of it all and to see what's in store! We've already started to check off some major items on the checklist, so that's relieved some of the stress of the last few weeks. After some intense searching, we've found a great place to live in a town called North Saanich. As we're not big "city" people, (even though Victoria isn't that big of a city) we decided to try and find a place a little outside of the city, but close enough for both of us to commute in. North Saanich is on the Saanich Peninsula, about 30 minutes north of Victoria. It's surrounded on three sides by the ocean, and we've been blessed to find a home across the street from the water! It seems like a great town, and close to some amazing sights, and we're feeling really blessed to know we have a place to stay when we get there!<br />
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We've decided to drive there as opposed to flying and shipping our cars. We're also not taking much with us. We downsized a lot when we moved to Port Stanley, so we've decided to take it a step further and move with no furniture at all! We're selling all the furniture we have left, and will buy some new items once we're settled in our new home. We're just taking some clothes, toiletries, a few boxes of momentos/books/personal items, and that's it! We'll each drive a car, with Franklin hitchin' a ride in the back of the bigger car. We leave for our journey on Sunday September 28th and plan to arrive in North Saanich on Friday October 3rd. Right now the plan is to take the Trans-Canada highway. We thought about driving through the States, but decided to take in the sights on the Canadian side instead. Neither of us have done that drive ourselves, and we hear it's beautiful so it looks like we're gonna' keep it pure Canadian! We're taking 6 days to do it as we don't want to be driving more than 8 hours a day or so, as it'll just get too tiring (plus we don't want to have Franklin in the car for longer than that every day).<br />
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In terms of where I'll be working - I'm in the process of seeing if I can get a transfer. In case that doesn't pan out (we only have one large-format store there so positions are few and far between), I've started applying at other places, which is a surreal experience as I've been at the same company for so long! It's also very unconcerting to think that there's a possibility I might be unemployed for awhile. I'm someone who needs to work, so I'm determined to line something up before we leave Ontario! Now that we know where we'll be living I'm able to focus my job search a bit more to areas that are within commuting distance. <br />
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So still lots of things to do, figure out, and plan and prep for! If you're the praying type, if you could keep us in your prayers as we undertake this new adventure, that would be awesome! Pray that we get through our to-do lists with grace and gratitude, that we have a safe journey from Ontario to BC, that we remain in good health during this busy time, that our financial needs for our journey are covered, and that I find a well-paying job. Most of all though, pray that we continue to lean in and rely on God. I tend to worry about things, so my brain's been going at 100 mph the past few weeks, thinking of all the "what ifs". We know that this is God's plan for us and everything will work itself out (some of our prayers have already been answered!), but prayers for reminders of that are always needed!<br />
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I plan to update this blog a lot more as we continue on this journey - both as we wrap up our lives in Ontario and as we make the journey to BC, so feel free to check in from time to time to see how things are progressing in this next chapter of our lives. I've attached some pics of Vancouver Island (including some of North Saanich) so you can see our new stomping grounds!<br />
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Here's to new adventures on the west coast!<br />
:) Suz<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-33440375417094649352014-05-25T14:57:00.001-04:002014-05-25T15:11:08.091-04:00When the lights are on, but nobody's home (Or, "What it's like to get two concussions in less than two months")<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
<br />
This is the scene of the crime. Or at least, the second one.<br />
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About six weeks ago, yours truly went out to get something from the shed. It was raining and slippery (but I had my rubber boots on with the good grips!), and as I was leaving the shed I slipped on the wooden planks and had a total wipe-out. I know I hit my tailbone, as it was sore for days afterwards, but the bulk of the force was on the back of my head. I remember laying there for awhile (in the rain), thinking I didn't know if I could get up, and maybe if I lay there for awhile one of my neighbours would see me (which is crazy, as our backyard by the shed is super private and goes into the woods, so who could see me anyways?!) I also distinctly remember thinking "I can't believe I just fell - <em>again</em>.")<br />
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You see, about seven weeks before that, I had fallen down the stairs at our old house. That fall I ended up with a damaged tailbone and a mild concussion. The concussion wasn't even diagnosed until almost a week afterwards, and although I was out for a few days, it got better pretty quickly. I'm a bit of a klutz, but still - 2 major falls for me in such a short period of time is definitely a personal record.<br />
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Anyway - I don't really remember how I got back into the house from outside - everything's a bit of a blur from then until a few days afterwards to be honest. I do know I got a horrible headache and started throwing up and couldn't stop, so Chris took me to the ER at the hospital in St.Thomas (which PS - has the fastest, most efficient emergency room I've ever seen), and I was there for awhile. Got diagnosed with a "bad" concussion, had some tests, then was told I'd need to be off work (and pretty much everything else) for at least one week, possibly two depending on how I felt). I was given some pretty strict instructions not to do anything involving screens or really anything involving concentration. Basically it was: no work, no TV, no phone, no computer, no music, no reading, no writing, no exercise, no driving).<br />
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The first few days that was fine - my head was killing me and I just slept most of the time. After about day 3 though, when I started to be up and moving around again, I started noticing the <em>really</em> weird symptoms, and things I hadn't really had (at least not this severe) with the first knock to the head.<br />
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First of all, I was angry, like really, <em>really</em> angry and irritable. I don't remember what I said, but Chris says I said some pretty horrible things. It was like my brain couldn't or wouldn't filter <em>anything</em>. I've always been a very nice, polite person - and very aware of other people's feelings, so this was kind of uncharted territory. It made me afraid to even go out and walk the dog, as if I saw someone do something that for some reason irritated me at all, I probably would have said something really mean to them. It sounds strange to even write it, but I guess it was kind of like I didn't care at all about anyone else during that time and my emotions were ruling. If I was angry, I'd say something horrible. If I was sad, <em>at all</em>, I'd cry.<br />
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Chris was fabulous throughout it - the literature they had given us about it said this was perfectly normal, and would pass in awhile. My physiotherapist I'm seeing now (yup - I had to start going to physiotherapy) also said not to worry, and I wasn't going crazy. She'd seen it many, many times before and these feelings of anger, irritability and sadness would pass with time.<br />
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The second thing I noticed, and probably the thing that has been the hardest to work through, was the confusion. It's the hardest thing to explain to anyone who hasn't had a concussion before. The way I've been explaining it to people now is: you know how in the summer, there are some days when it's really hot and everyone uses their AC at the same time and there's so much demand for the power that it shorts out the power and there's an outage? That's what it's like. It's like there's just too much information my brain is trying to process, too much demand for brain power, so it just has a 'power outage' and shuts itself down. I would find myself suddenly not knowing where I was, what I was doing, why I was doing it, what day it was, even in essence, <em>who</em> I was. It's not like I forgot my name or anything, but it was like I just couldn't connect the dots in my head, I couldn't put <em>context</em> behind anything. The first few times I did walk the dog after it happened, I kept reminding myself every few steps "I'm walking my dog Franklin, I live at the house at the end of the street, I'm walking my dog Franklin, I live at the house at the end of the street" 'cause I was afraid I would get lost! It also didn't help that this whole time my head was still hurting incessantly, and I wasn't sleeping very well. Every night I had a really hard time falling asleep, and once I did I would wake up pretty much at least once an hour.<br />
<br />
After the first week off, I was going to attempt to go back to work on the Monday. I was still feeling pretty rough, but was determined to "tough it out" and give it a go. On the Sunday beforehand, Chris and I decided to go see my parents at their farm near Port Dover. I hadn't driven yet since it happened, so Chris suggested I drive for a bit to see how it went so he was sure I was okay to drive to work the next morning (I commute about an hour to work in London). Well . . . it didn't go so well. I made it out of Port Stanley, but about 5-10 minutes in I started feeling really weird, and had to pull over once we made it to St.Thomas. I got really nauseous, the pressure in the back of my head got really bad, and apparently the confusion got really bad too. If my brain was having a hard time filtering incoming information, it was as if driving and trying to filter information <em>while moving</em>, made all the symptoms even worse. The whole rest of the day I was pretty out of it and not feeling well, so I ended up taking off the second week as well to recover more.<br />
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So fast forward to the end of the second week. By this point I'm telling myself "alright brain - you've been off for two weeks now - get it together!" I still wasn't feeling great, but was putting on a good front I think, as I didn't want to be seen as a wimp. I now fully realize that a concussion falls under the "traumatic brain injury" category, and is not something to be taken lightly.<br />
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I was nervous to go back to work, as I knew I wasn't feeling like my normal self, but I was also excited, as being off work for two weeks not being able to do much is really, really, <em>really</em> boring. Seriously - I know most people would think "oh, I'd love to be off work for a few weeks and not do anything", but when you really can't do <em>anything</em>, let me tell you - it sucks!<br />
<br />
I drove myself to work that first day, and . . . it didn't go well. I don't really remember a whole lot about that day. I know I somehow made it through the whole work day (I now hear from my co-workers how out of it I was that day and how they knew I wasn't ready to be back - apparently I was really confused and had to keep asking for help as I couldn't remember how to do things and wasn't able to make even the smallest of decisions). I somehow got home, only to start throwing up again and had a severe headache, and ended up back in the emergency room. The doctor said it was a relapse, and because I had attempted to go back to "normal life" before my brain was fully healed, it was like the concussion had just happened. I was back to square one, and had to begin the concussion recovery steps all over again. I was out of work for another week, and it was then that I was also referred to a physiotherapist, to follow me as I recovered. <br />
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After that third week, I was now back to work, but did a graduated return to work. That first week back, I worked 4-hour shifts, the second week back I worked 6-hour shifts, and this last week was my first week back at 8-hour shifts. It's been slow going, but I'm now back to a regular work schedule and feeling like things are slowly getting back to normal.<br />
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I'm still doing physiotherapy, but now I'm down to one appointment a week. We do some neck stretches and balance exercises and stuff, but the main component is getting electro-magnetic pulse therapy. They attach little electrodes to my earlobes, and it sends pulses to my brain. It helps to reset the pathways in your brain (that's the easiest way to describe it I guess). Is it helping? Well I'm back to work and down to one appointment a week, so I think it definitely is! It's been really helpful too to just have someone to talk to each week who really knows about concussions and walk me through the recovery.<br />
<br />
I still have a "permaheadache", and this last week while I was working full shifts for the first time, they got really bad. I sometimes get really bad pressure at the back of my head, and it almost feels like my head is filling up with water. That's a signal to me that I need to take a break and let myself zone out for awhile. I can tell my brain's still having a hard time processing all the information that's coming at me all the time at work. I also work in a really bright, noisy environment, so it's been tough. My work place has been fabulous though and very understanding. I can tuck into the office for awhile, turn down the music and put my sunglasses on, and give my brain a break when I need to, and everyone's been really accommodating when I ask them to slow down a bit when they talk to me. I've been pretty upfront about what I can and cannot understand, and when I need help with something. As far as the confusion goes, the hardest thing now I'm finding is when people are either trying to talk to me when there's other conversations or noise going on in the background, or when people are talking really fast. It's kind of like I then hear the first sentence or two they say, but everything after that turns into gobbly-gook and I can't understand what they're saying. I'm also still having a bit of a hard time reading - I can read and write, but if I'm reading something that's on a full page of text I have a hard time deciphering what I'm reading. One trick I'm doing now is to just cover up the rest of the page with a blank piece of paper, so only the paragraph I'm reading is visible, and then I just move the blank paper down as I continue reading the rest of the page. It's frustrating, but I'm making progress.<br />
<br />
Noise in general is tough - I haven't listened to music in 6 weeks, so I really miss that, but I can listen to talk radio no problem. I think with music, it's just again - too much information to process. Each separate instrument coming at me, plus singing, it's just to much. Hopefully that passes soon, as I had just downloading a few new albums from iTunes right before this all happened, and I really want to give them a good listen!<br />
<br />
Driving is fine now - I wear sunglasses while driving now, even on the cloudiest day, as it just mutes the colours a bit. Thankfully at least half my drive is in the country, so it's a bit of a calmer environment to drive through than the city.<br />
<br />
Anyway, this has turned into a really long post. I think I just needed to write out how I've been feeling, both to make myself feel better, and also to help explain to people what this experience has been like.<br />
<br />
I know it could have been much worse. I am terrified now of hitting my head again though, as I could get permanent brain damage. For the life of me, I can't understand why athletes would continue to play after getting a few concussions. Before this happened (even after the first one which wasn't bad at all compared to this one), I always though concussions were something you recovered from and weren't that big of a deal. I now know they're a big deal, as your brain is <em>your brain</em>! It's you - how you act, how you think, what you do. It's the centrepiece of you as a person. If you injure that, it can be very hard (sometimes impossible) to recover from.<br />
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Thankfully I am recovering from it, and from where I am now in the recovery process, I can look back and say I've learned three major things from this experience.<br />
<br />
1) As my husband tells me often - "you need to slow down!" I've gotten better these last few years at taking longer breaks from things (really relaxing on vacations, days off, etc), but I still have a tendency to rush through my "normal" days. I can very much be a "what's next?" kind of person. Always rushing through the current task I'm working on, so I can move on to the next thing. That's probably what I was doing when I was out at the shed that day. Just moving too fast and not paying full attention to the moment. I'm now forced to be slower at some things, and as frustrating as that can be, it's definitely been something I've been reflecting on and learning from. <br />
<br />
2) Compassion for invisible injuries - a head injury is most often an "invisible injury". Unlike a broken arm or leg, unless you tell someone about your injury, it is most often impossible for someone else to know what's going on with you. As upfront as I've been with my co-workers about it, it's obviously not something I'm broadcasting to every customer I help at the store, and I've had several embarrassing moments so far at work where I'm trying to help someone with something and have had to call for assistance as I just can't figure something out (whereas before these things would come to me no problem). The first week back I think I cried every single day at work (privately, not in front of people), because I was just frustrated at myself for not being 100% yet. There've been instances where I can tell people are looking at me like "how many times do I have to tell this girl what I'm looking for?!", because they don't know that I'm recovering from a concussion and am having a hard time understanding what they're saying. On my end, it's made me much more understanding of other people's behaviour in general. Sometimes I deal with people who get really angry, or say inappropriate things, or just act strangely. Whereas before I'd think "who do they think they are?" or "wow - that person is out to lunch", now I think "well maybe they have an invisible injury, maybe they have some sort of disability that makes them act that way". Of course, some people <em>are</em> just mean or inappropriate, but it's given me the insight to understand that some people really can't control the way they act, and they need just as much compassion and consideration from me as anyone else.<br />
<br />
3) Life is short. We all know this, but this experience drove it home a little bit more. I wasn't planning on falling and hitting my head again that day. I wasn't planning on injuring my brain and feeling for weeks like I was lost in my own head. You just never know what's around the next corner. You just never know how long you'll be here. It ties into #1, but just that theme of really living your days, soaking in what life has to offer you, and really being thankful for each day you have, that's been a huge reminder to me throughout all this. It's also changed me in the sense that I no longer have time for nonsense. It's almost as if that emotional / no filter thing that started happening a few days after this concussion has never fully gone away. Thankfully the anger part has (which I'm sure my husband is <em>very</em> greatful for), but the part of me that before would have maybe filtered my words or behaviour when it came to dealing with "nonsense", is now gone, lol. I've always been fairly upfront and honest when it came to expressing myself when I disagreed with someone, etc. Now it's like I'm a little more abrupt with it. It's not as if I'm not polite or anything, it's more like I just realize I don't have the time to tip-toe around any issue anymore. I've become even more "tell it like it is" - I don't know if that's a result of the concussion, or it's a result of realizing how truly short life is and I don't want to waste my time or my words, but so far it's actually been a really positive change.<br />
<br />
Well, that's it for now. If you actually made it to the end of this, thanks for reading it, and hopefully it gives you some insight into this sort of injury in case you have someone in your life who has been through it or will go through it or something worse in the future.<br />
<br />
I'm now entering Week #7 of recovery, and am confident that soon I'll be back at 100%. These past few weeks I've just been getting used to being back at work, and outside of physio appointments have kept things pretty simple - just work, physio and sleep for the most part. Now I'm slowly starting to re-integrate other areas of my life into the "rotation", and I'm so happy and thankful I'm at that point. 7 weeks is nothing in the grand scheme of things, I know that. But it's been one of the weirdest, most challenging areas of my life so far after 34 years on this planet. It's driven me to learn more about the brain and how it works, and to re-examine areas of my life that I know I need to change.<br />
<br />
Thanks all.<br />
<br />
:)<br />
<br />
Suz<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-26274205042674289052014-02-12T14:30:00.001-05:002014-02-12T15:05:13.687-05:00The Judges Next Adventure!<br />
We're moving again!<br />
<br />
Yes . . . again.<br />
<br />
Turns out the love of living a somewhat nomadic lifestyle continues to burn bright in both of us Judges, so we've decided to pack up and call a new place home in March.<br />
<br />
We'll be leaving London and moving about 25 minutes away to the town of Port Stanley, which is right on Lake Erie.<br />
<br />
We hadn't really been planning on moving anytime soon, but an opportunity came up to rent this super cute little cottage home (with amazing lake views) and we just couldn't pass it up. It's actually both a bit of a dream come true and an answer to prayer! <br />
<br />
A little history - shortly after we got married, my husband and I moved to a little house right on the shore of Lake Simcoe. We only lived there for a year, but it was a magical year and we've always looked back fondly on our time there and knew that eventually we wanted to move back to living near the water. We're both big time "water people" and I've always said I always feel most at home when I'm in, on, or near the water. We've lived in a lot of different homes and environments since that year on the lake (seriously - we are experts at moving), but 6 and a half years later and we're finally making our way back to the lifestyle we both enjoy the most!<br />
<br />
Port Stanley is a <em>very</em> cute little town, and went there quite a bit this past summer. When we first moved to the London area we considered moving there, but there was nothing available at the time and we thought it would be too far of a drive, considering we both work in London. After visiting Port Stanley in the summer though we realized it's actually not that far at all (well, not far for anyone who is from the GTA and used to commuting), so we've kept a bit of an eye on the area from time to time just to see if anything came available. Sure enough a listing came up not too long ago that Chris spotted so we decided to go check it out and of course absolutely fell in love with it.<br />
<br />
It's a small house. Like, really small. As in tiny, tiny . . . <em>really tiny</em>. 600 square feet to be exact. But it's 600 square feet of pure character. It sits up on the top of a tall cliff that overlooks the main beach area below. There are stairs at the end of our road that lead down to the beach below, or we can walk about 10 minutes to another, more private beach. The front of the house is all windows and has some spectacular views of the lake, and the area itself where our house is seems quite quiet and friendly and away from the more touristy part of town. Both times we went to look at the house, every single person we drove past waved at us - I love that small town vibe! It has two small bedrooms (one we'll turn into a little office), 1 tiny bathroom, and then a combined open plan living space/kitchen. The house is so small that the entire place is heated by a gas fireplace. It's also so small that the washing machine is in the kitchen - ha! It does have a huge covered patio in the backyard, which pretty much doubles the living space in the warmer months, and a 2-level shed in the backyard as well. The yard is pretty big (with a firepit - woo hoo!) and it drops off at the back into a forest with a ravine.<br />
<br />
I'm really excited - like, <em>really</em> excited. Not just to be living back on the water again, but I'm so excited to be downsizing. This past summer I started to have a great desire to downsize, and both Chris and I started talking about how great it would be to just sell everything. I think we're both pretty good about not having too much of a personal attachment towards "things", and our plan (and prayers) for our long-term future is to be able to just pack up a suitcase or backpack and just "go", and not feel weighed down by belongings. While we're both extremely grateful for the house we live in now, (this house itself was an answer to prayer when we first decided to move to London and couldn't find a place to live at first!) we know it really is too big for the two of us and the dog, and we've both never been fans of having space that doesn't get used a lot. We're probably fairly minimalistic already to many people's standards, but we've both really felt a need to pair down more and get back to an even more simplistic, minimalist lifestyle. The rent in our new house is also less than half of what we're paying now, so we're definitely excited that we'll be able to save more and become even better stewards of our money! <br />
<br />
Our current house is about 1800 square feet, so we're getting rid of at least 75% of all our belongings, but probably more like 90% as we really want to move with the bare minimums. We've already sold most of our furniture, and are now going through the rest of our stuff to either sell, give away or donate. This will definitely be the easiest move we've ever done, as we'll hardly have anything to move!<br />
<br />
I'm sure we're going to have some moments (perhaps many moments), when we both feel cramped or get cabin fever, but I feel confident that this is probably going to end up being one of the best decisions we have ever made. And it's just another example of how God so knows the desires of our hearts and is constantly opening doors and shedding light on new opportunities for growth and ways to shed the things in our lives that we don't need or are holding us back, whether it's physical "things" or just the "noise" of a place or environment.<br />
<br />
The pics below are of our new place and our new town. Here's to new adventures!<br />
<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-22205371917078556942013-12-20T03:48:00.003-05:002013-12-20T03:48:39.993-05:00Random Ramblings<br />
I'm not sleepy.<br />
<br />
It's 3:07am as I write this, and I'm debating whether or not I should go to bed. I'm still wired from a series of late nights at the store, and I'm off tomorrow, so I think my brain and my body are still decompressing. I usually need a few good hours of "decompress-mode" after work before I can hit the sack. Especially after a closing shift, where I usually hit my second wind right around when most other people are probably getting ready for bed.<br />
<br />
It probably doesn't help that I drank a Dr.Pepper when I got home.<br />
<br />
Come to think of it, it probably doesn't help that I ate some chocolate either.<br />
<br />
Or that I'm sitting in front of a bright computer screen.<br />
<br />
Hmmm . . . .<br />
<br />
Anyway - how's it going dear reader? How has this Holiday season been treating you thus far? ;)<br />
<br />
I'm been busy as a bee these last few weeks (these last few months actually!) I know most people are probably counting down to Christmas (5 more days in case you were wondering), but I myself am counting down to January.<br />
<br />
Primarily because that's when the craziness dies down a bit in my life, but mostly because my favourite holiday of the year is in January (New Year's Day!) <strong>AND</strong> I have a whole week of vacation in January - woot woot!<br />
<br />
I am excited about Christmas though. I'm not a big getting presents kind of person anymore (<em>but I don't think most adults are though, right? You get to the point where you can afford to buy what you want for yourself and the excitement of getting presents kind of goes away a bit. I do love buying presents though - especially for the kiddos - I could spend hours in Toys R Us!</em>) I am pretty stoked though to be spending Christmas Day and Boxing Day at my parents farm in Simcoe. It'll just be them and Chris and I this year, but the following weekend we're going back for another visit, as my sister and her family will be coming down as well, so I get double the dose of Brimley/Greenway family farm famjam!<br />
<br />
Sorry - maybe I <em>am</em> tired - I just wrote "family farm famjam".<br />
<br />
And now I've written it twice.<br />
<br />
Yikes.<br />
<br />
Okay, moving on.<br />
<br />
In other news - Franklin the dog has decided to shed more in the last few weeks than he ever has in his entire existence. I swear if his fur was worth money I would be typing this on a gold keyboard while someone fed me chocolate and massaged my feet. I think even Frankin is amazed at the amount he is shedding. He walked past a clump of dog hair on the floor just now and looked at it and then me with a sort of amazement in his eyes. That or he was silently judging me for not vacuuming enough.<br />
<br />
I'm convinced though that Frankers is a canine weather predictor. He's obviously in the process of growing the thickest, craziest dog coat ever in the history of time - because he knows (he just knows!) that now that we live in London we will be subjected to the snowiest, coldest winter known to man. Seriously - I've seen more snow and felt more cold in the last few weeks than we ever did when we lived in the Barrie snowbelt. We moved here last November, and I don't remember it being like this so early on in the season last year. It probably doesn't help that I lost my favourite winter gloves and need new waterproof winter boots <em>(as having cold hands and wet feet is maybe making me a little grumpier about winter than last year),</em> but I regress - my dog can predict the weather - amazing!<br />
<br />
Alright - I'm gonna' wrap this sucker up. Speaking of the dog, need to let him out one more time before we try getting some shut eye.<br />
<br />
I promise my next post will be more coherent than this one.<br />
<br />
Note to self - blog posts at 3am - not your best idea.<br />
<br />
;) Suz<br />
<br />
P.S. - just let the dog out. He predicts rain for tomorrow folks. Just sos ya knows!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-68941990623285793302013-12-05T14:17:00.001-05:002013-12-05T14:17:06.364-05:00You Are Not Special<br />
You are not special.<br />
<br />
I am not special.<br />
<br />
"We" are not special.<br />
<br />
Ouch.<br />
<br />
Harsh right?<br />
<br />
This is the message of several blogs/articles that have been circling the internet over the past several months. I've read them with interest, as this is something that's been on my heart for awhile now - this idea or concept of elevating oneself over others that comes from thinking you are somehow . . . <em>special</em>. <br />
<br />
Some of these articles I found way too demeaning - viewpoints that dehumanized our existence and left myself as the reader feeling quite frankly, a little depressed. Others leaned too much to the other side - applauding a little too exuberantly the idea that life itself is a miracle and that each and every one of us can and should accomplish everything our hearts desire during our time here on Earth.<br />
<br />
I fall somewhere in the middle. Actually that's not entirely true. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say I lean more towards the side that says we are not in fact, special.<br />
<br />
It all comes down to how you use the word of course. "Special" by definition means "better or greater than". In the context I'm referring to here though, it means "better or greater than someone else <em>entirely</em>".<br />
<br />
I don't think I'm special. And no offense to anyone else who is reading this, but - I don't think you're special either. I don't think that any one person's <u>worth</u> is better than or greater than another's. Of course I think some people are "better" or more skilled at some <em>things</em> than others. Some are smarter than others, some are funnier, etc, etc. My dad for instance is better at math and science than anyone else I know. My husband is one of the best speakers I've ever seen. I'm probably a better singer than a lot of my family and friends. But that doesn't make them special. It doesn't make me special.<br />
<br />
Because as good as my dad is at math and science - there's a heck of a lot of people out there who are smarter than him in those areas. As skilled as my husband is at communicating, I know there are a slew of others whose skills are equal to or exceed his. And as confident as I am now in my singing abilities, I know for sure that there are flocks and flocks of singers out there who could outsing me on their worst days. And even those people who are better or more skilled, there are people out there who are even better than they are. There will always be someone who is "better".<br />
<br />
I think we all know this on a base level, but the thing is - we're living in a very weird/interesting time in history. With both the ability to have instant access to information and the constant communication we're in with each other all the time, we can instantly put ourselves "out there" with this attitude of "<em>look at me! look at me! look at what I'm doing! look at what I'm good at! I'm so special!!!!" </em>And with this attitude we also tend to adopt the attitude or thinking that because we are "special" we are somehow "better" - not just at that one skill but somehow overall.<br />
<br />
And it's not just with people who are highly skilled in certain areas. I don't know about you, but I see it all the time. People who have this sense of entitlement, a sense that they deserve better, a sense that they <em>are</em> better. And it comes from people from all walks of life. Upper class, middle class, lower class, from the West, from the East, from the young to the old. I know I myself have adopted this attitude from time to time, although it's definitely something I'm becoming a lot more aware of (plus I have a very level-headed husband who won't hesitate to call me out when I take on a "better than" attitude!)<br />
<em></em><br />
As I was doing some reading on this subject I did some quick digging and found that there are over 7 Billion people on Earth. Roughly 4 people are born every second. Of every minute. Of every hour. Of every day.<br />
<br />
Crazy right?! It's so awesome and humbling at the same time. Talk about putting your "status" in this world into perspective!<br />
<br />
Think about it - <em>4 people born every second</em>. So where do we get this idea that we're special? Don't get me wrong. Every child is a gift, and for those of us blessed with parents who welcomed us with tears of joy, we were (and are) indeed "special" . . . <strong><em><u>to them</u></em></strong>. But when you zoom out from the picture of your parents holding you for the first time in the hospital, to the other sets of parents beaming down at the 240 <em>other</em> babies born that minute, and then to the 14,400 <em>other</em> babies born that hour, to the 345,600 <em>other</em> babies born that day.<br />
<br />
Well, you get the idea. Your birth was really not all that "special". You were/are a gift, a blessing - we all are. Each breath we take is a gift, and our lives truly can be a blessing to each other. But with 7+ billion of us, we're not all that . . . <em>special</em>.<br />
<br />
I don't mean to offend at all - I believe in God our creator and I believe in His great design for our lives.<br />
<br />
I think I'm coming to realize though that I believe more in our uniqueness, than our specialness. When you start to think about how, in a world of over 7 billion people, none of our DNA is exactly the same - that's pretty crazy and awesome, in a whole different way. When you begin to wrap your brain around that - that 7 billion people are truly different, <em>are unique creatures</em>, and none hold more worth than the other, it shifts your own attitude about yourself a little bit.<br />
<br />
It's been a ongoing perspective shift for me, and I'm still working on it. I've gone through periods in my life so far where I've been incredibly prideful - where I've just expected a lot, simply <em>"because".</em> It's been incredibly helpful to me recently to remember that I'm not <em>special</em>, I'm <strong>unique</strong>. When I find myself feeling a little bit entitled, thinking "why is this happening to <em>me</em>", "why <em>can't</em> I have that?", "how dare they treat <em>me</em> like that!" I try to remember that we are all unique beings on this earth, and I am in no way shape or form above anyone or anything. It then becomes more of a realization of "why <em>wouldn't</em> this happen to me", "why <em>would</em> I have that", and "why <em>wouldn't</em> they treat me like that" - it helps take the <strong>me</strong> out of the equation and keeps everything on a level playing field.<br />
<br />
It has also helped to motivate me to celebrate my uniqueness, and to be more accepting of myself. When you began to rid yourself of that need to stand not just <em>out</em>, but <em>above</em> others, and to just stand <em>with</em> others instead, it frees you in a way nothing else can. When you start to celebrate not just your own innate uniqueness, but the uniqueness of those around you, it adds a level of joy to what you're doing. It takes away an unhealthy pressure, and replaces it with a more healthy striving to improve not just your own life or lifestyle, but the lives of others. I don't mean to get all cheesy on you here, but when you look at the people who have really impacted this world in a positive way, I think it's safe to say that the vast majority of them weren't thinking of themselves when they accomplished what they did. They weren't looking to stand above, to elevate, to be superior, or special. They weren't looking out for the betterment of their own lives. They were looking to stand <em>with</em>, they were looking for equality, they were looking out for the betterment of the lives of <em>others</em>.<br />
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So no, I don't think I'm special.<br />
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I'm unique. <br />
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I am the only me in a world of 7 billion people. <br />
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You are the only you. <br />
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And that my friends, is pretty darn cool.<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-8242584794077107492013-11-12T01:11:00.001-05:002013-11-12T01:59:05.644-05:00Winter is coming . . . <br />
I'm sitting here in my favourite chair, at midnight, as the snow continues to fall outside.<br />
<br />
Winter is coming . . . <br />
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Actually, as far as I'm concerned, once the first snowfall happens it's winter already. Break out the snow boots, the windshield scrapers, shovels and salt, and settle in for a season of coldness, greyness, wetness and blahness.<br />
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Or . . . get excited for a season of snowflakes, snowmen, Christmas trees, hot chocolate and gatherings with family and friends.<br />
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Which one to pick? <br />
<br />
;)<br />
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This year, I pick the latter. I've had a few years at this point in my life when I've gravitated more towards the former. Seeing the snow fall for the first time of the season and feeling a sort of dread. I love Summer - I am a full-on beach lovin', sun lovin', flip flop kinda' gal. So for me, the realization that Winter has arrived has mostly been a bit of a let down in the past, more of a "just get through it and start counting down the days until Summer arrives again" kind of thing.<br />
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Not this year though. Life is way too short to live with a "just get through it" attitude.<br />
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Today I saw the snow falling and I got excited. Like, really excited. I may have spontaneously broken out into a happy dance right in the middle of the sales floor at my store.<br />
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I don't know what's changed, I didn't actually consciously <em>choose</em> when I heard it may snow today to be excited about it. But I'll tell 'ya - I saw that snow falling through the sky today and it represented something to me . . . <br />
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<em>Opportunity</em>.<br />
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A whole new season. Not just season as in weather, but season as in <em>life</em>.<br />
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How amazing is it that we live another day, another month, another year, another season in life? Sometimes it can seem like the odds are so highly stacked against us it's hard to see around them. But in my 33 years of life, I have experienced roughly 12,045 days, or <em>17,344,800 minutes</em>, where I have beaten the odds.<br />
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That's crazy-town. In the best possible way.<br />
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Every single day, every single minute, is someone's last. Not to get all morbid on you, but it's both a sobering and amazingly life-affirming thing to think about that every once in awhile. Life is truly a gift, yet we spend so much of our time feeling ticked off about it.<br />
<br />
Snow falls, and we sigh and think Winter is coming. We cringe as we think about all the snow we'll have to shovel, or that we have to dig out our gloves and that horrible winter jacket we hate. We get anxious as we think about having to commute in this weather, or that the heating bill will go up.<br />
<br />
Or . . . <br />
<br />
Snow falls, and we smile and think Winter is coming. We're thankful that we still have the physical strength to shovel the driveway at the house we're blessed to live in, and that we have gloves and a warm winter jacket to wear that still fits. We're grateful as we commute to a job we're lucky to have in this economy (that will pay our heating bill in our cozy house), in a car that runs and keeps us safe.<br />
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All the while, I breathe in, I breathe out.<br />
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<em>I am alive.</em><br />
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Winter is coming . . . Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-84815646186650734072013-10-05T16:30:00.001-04:002013-10-05T16:30:40.163-04:00Getting Organized<br />
I used to be super organized - like really, <em>really</em> organized. Schedules, calendars, home life, work life, school life - all organized and accounted for. <br />
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Somewhere along the way in the last several years though, I seem to have lost my penchant for organizing. I'm still somewhat organized, and if you asked anyone at work I'm sure they would probably tell you that I'm the "organized" one, but I can tell I'm not nearly as on top of it as I once was.<br />
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I'm not entirely sure why - being organized and having things planned out has always really worked for me and the way I process information. I've always enjoyed the process of planning and mapping out my days, projects and work space, and find it rather cathartic. It also makes life a lot easier and smoother when you have a "plan" - not just for the big stuff but for the little stuff as well. I think for whatever reason I just fell out of the habit of being organized and found it difficult to get started again. <br />
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Lately I've been feeling a strong desire to get back into the habit of being highly organized. I'm on Pinterest, and love some of the posts and links I've seen recently about systems other people are using to plan and get some more structure in their lives. I've also started combing the shelves of Staples and Michaels - getting some ideas for organizational tools I can customize in ways that both work for me and where I can add a creative touch.<br />
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As I've started to get back into this process, I'm realizing: a) how much I've missed it, b) how precious our time is, and c) how much time I've let get away from me! Time goes by so quickly, and I'm realizing how easily I can waste a lot of time when I let myself become disorganized. I also realize that having unstructured time is important sometimes, especially for us creative types who like to dream and imagine and create. But perhaps plotting out and <em>structuring</em> those times when you can be unstructured (instead of all your time being unstructured) is actually the way to go. I used to actually schedule very specific times in my planner to write and work on music, and at the time it really worked!<br />
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We have so many distractions these days. It really can be <em>way</em> too easy and frequent to get to the end of the day and wonder what happened to the hours and how it's time for bed already. Keeping organized - having a plan for your days, mapping out your short and long-term goals - I know it works, and I'm determined to get back into the habit.<br />
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So here's to organizing, having a plan, and getting back to what works!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-77737779641943828392013-08-26T12:47:00.000-04:002013-08-26T12:47:42.500-04:00On vacation, focus & cutting back the noise<br />
Well today's the last day of our summer vacation. It's been an amazing 10 days, and I'm just really grateful to have had a solid block of time off with my husband, where we could relax and "vacate" from the busyness of our lives. We had a stay-cation, but the awesome thing we've discovered about living in London is that we're now so close to all our favourite Ontario beaches! We spent the majority of our days hangin' out at the beach (Grand Bend, Port Stanley, Sauble) and discovered some new ones along the way (Port Franks - gorgeous beach there!) We never did make it down to Long Point (one of our other faves), but the summer's not yet over yet, right? :)<br />
<br />
I've always been a bit of a fish, so swimming and just being near the water automatically slows me down and brings me an amazing sense of calmness and fullness. Unless you're a water-person yourself, it really is hard to describe exactly how happy being on the water makes me. The best I can probably do is say that I feel most like myself when I'm there. It helps centre me and slow down the wheels in my head that I feel are spinning at about 1000 rotations a minute most of the time. The immensity of water, the force of it I think - kind of forces you to remember that your problems are not nearly as large as you thought they were, and the beauty of it is a constant reminder that God is everywhere and in everything. <br />
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I also love how being in the water brings out the kid in everyone. Chris and I spent another day at Port Stanley yesterday, and met up with my mom and dad for a day of swimming, talking and eating. It was a perfect beach day - not too hot, windy but not <em>too</em> windy, and big waves. We had a great time playing in the waves, and I'll never forget how hard we all laughed as we splashed about and got pummeled by one wave after the other. You know those moments in life that are so perfect you actually think <em>"I'm going to remember this for the rest of my life"</em> - I definitely had one of those yesterday. Me, my mom and my dad - splashing about in the water laughing hysterically like a bunch of kids. It was perfect moment in time, and defintely a highlight of the entire week!<br />
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To change gears a little bit (well, completely actually) - one of the other things I've continued to spend some time reflecting on this past week off (something I've been thinking about / reading about / researching) for probably a good 8 months or so now - is our use of technology/smartphones/social media and how that's changing the way we interact with each other, the way we process information, the way we use our time, and our overall behaviour. Don't worry - this is not about to become a huge rant against technology, just some things I've noticed for myself and what I'll be doing with that in my own life.<br />
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Here's the thing - for the most part, social media / smartphone technology has not improved my life. It's made it more convenient, that's for sure. But if I'm being 100% honest with myself, it hasn't made me smarter, improved my character, helped me focus, helped me achieve any goals or deepened my relationships. It <em>has</em> - helped me share what's going on in my life, helped me keep up-to-date with what's going on in other peoples lives, helped me keep up-to-date with what's going on in the world, and made me more accessible.<br />
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It has also though - made me dependent, stolen my focus, stolen my time, & made me believe I <em>have</em> to keep people up-to-date with what's going on in my life, and <em>have</em> to keep up-to-date with what's going on in other peoples lives.<br />
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Now I'm not neccessarily saying that keeping people up-to-date with what's going on in your life and vice versa is a bad thing. What I've really been thinking about and looking at is <em>why</em> it's become such a huge thing for us in our society and why we seem to be becoming so addicted to it.<br />
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I can only speak for myself of course, but I know I'm probably not the only one who has a feeling that this is not good for us - that we're going down a road we either shouldn't be going down, or we're travelling along it so fast we're eventually going to crash. When you're sitting at the beach, or a restaurant (or anywhere really) and look around and see the majority of people immersed in something they're doing on their phones and not in the people who are actually sitting next to them or the environment around them - warning bells start to go off.<br />
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When something's happening, and people are focused only on capturing the moment on camera and not actually enjoying/living in the moment - warning bells start to go off.<br />
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When people no longer have the focus to carry-on conversation with one another without getting distracted by their phone - warning bells start to go off.<br />
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It just doesn't feel right - why do we care so much what's going on in our online worlds that we're willing to ignore what's right in front of us?<br />
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Who among us hasn't gotten a slight thrill when you notice a like or comment on something you've posted on facebook? Who among us hasn't felt validated when someone retweets something you've posted on twitter? And what about instagram, what about pinterest, what about all the other social media apps we're using?<br />
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Again - I'm not saying the technology is neccessarily bad, but the question is <em>why</em>? <em>Why</em> do I feel the need to post what I'm doing all the time on twitter or facebook? <em>Why</em> do I feel the need to post pictures of my day on instagram? <br />
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"Back in the day" for example - we used to take pictures, get them developed, then put them in a photo album to keep as a memento of that season/occasion in life, and maybe show them to our family and friends when they came to visit. Now with technology, we can show them to <em>everyone - </em>but of course we usually only show the pictures that have been edited so they look professional, and we only show the moments that make our lives maybe look a little more "elevated" than they actually are. Life isn't edited - life doesn't have filters you can put on it to make it look better - but that's what we're doing - that's what I'm doing! Turning life into an edited version of itself and then sharing it with anyone we can - it's like we live in this weird, pseudo-reality and have these avatars that are our spokesmen. <br />
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I bet some people know how to use it right. They've somehow been able to strike the right balance and use this technology in the way I suppose it was meant to be used at its inception. But I would hazard a guess and say that most of us don't use it "right". I know I don't. I know when I first joined facebook I thought it would be a great way to keep in touch with my close friends and family - share pictures and keep in touch more frequently. But then it morphed into something else entirely for me. It morphed into someplace where I was getting updates from a ton of people, that while it was nice to see from time to time what some people were up to, I was also getting updated on things that in "real life" they probably wouldn't update me on. There's so little filter online - people will share anything (and sometimes everything), and frankly it just turns into information overload. I only have so much I can take in before I start to shut down a little, and the amount of information I was taking in online had started to affect the information I was trying to & having to take in "offline". My focus dwindled, and I realized that what was once supposed to be a handy "tool" for me to keep in touch with the people I loved the most, had turned into something that was causing more harm then good. I decided to take a short facebook break, then decided to take a break from it for the entire summer. And it's been good. The people who needed to get in touch with me still found a way to get in touch with me, and any information I needed to find out I would have been able to find elsewhere (although there was nothing that I absolutely needed to know!)<br />
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It wasn't a complete social media break though - I've still been using Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest. And really - I've probably tweeted/instagrammed more since I gave up facebook, and when I think about the real reasons <em>why</em> I've been doing that - it would probably be because I'm still looking to feel important in some way. I'm still looking for some sort of outward validation that what I'm doing is important and people care about it.<br />
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It's not healthy though, and it still doesn't feel right. I realize that validation is not <em>all</em> bad - it's a form of accountability and we all should be accountable to some people (ie in the way I am accountable at work, in the way I am accountable to my friends and family). But validation in the form it comes in with most social media I've been using is a weird beast to struggle with. Who I am and how I value myself should not be in any way shape or form dependant on how and what other people "approve" of, but it seems that's the direction I've been starting to go down with my social media usage, and the direction I see so many other people going down.<br />
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So what does this all mean? Well to start, I'm going to continue my facebook sabbatical. I'm also going to be saying good-bye to Twitter for awhile, and adjust the way I use instagram and pinterest. My blog I'll probably keep open - I still really enjoy writing and this has never been something I've used for any sort of recognition or validation (and has actually helped me focus instead of being a distraction). <br />
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We'll see how it goes and if some time "away from it all" and more "aware of it all" is as good as I think it will be.<br />
<br />
Anyway - this did turn out to be a bit of a lengthy post! Again - I would like to stress that my experiences with social media technology are not everyones experience. If you're one of those people who have managed to use it in a way that's been truly beneficial to you in meaningful ways, then I really do commend you! <br />
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I also am completely aware of the irony in posting this on facebook/twitter. The reason I am is because I do have some people who have preferred to keep in touch with me via those outlets. If you're one of those people, I wanted to let you know that while I'm not going to post my email on here - if you'd like to keep in touch you know how to find me.<br />
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:) Suz <br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-78405715278847676182013-07-17T15:11:00.001-04:002013-07-17T15:28:05.375-04:00Can you hear Me?<br />
<em>** I wrote this blog back in the Spring, but was having trouble with the site and couldn't post it. As I'm going to attempt to start updating my blog again regularly, I went back through some saved drafts and decided to post it even though it's a little old. It still rings true for me, and just rereading it again I was taken back to that day and the significance of its lesson on me. Hope it maybe has some significance on you too!**</em><br />
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Well after about 30 hours that some crazy stomach virus decided to start its course through my body yesterday morning, I felt well enough to go for a short walk this afternoon. It's a beautiful Spring day, and I figured some fresh air would do me some good and hopefully speed up the recovery process.<br />
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I put on my rubber boots, grabbed the dogs leash and off we went. It was surprisingly quiet in my neighbourhood today. We live right near a big park - open fields, trails, a large pond and a huge forest - so I had expected quite a few people to be out and about enjoying the weather, but I guess maybe school hadn't been let out quite yet. Franklin and I ended up having the place to ourselves, which I love (as quiet suits me just fine), so we moseyed along - Franklin urging me to walk faster as he wanted to sniff absolutely everything that Spring has to offer.<br />
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As the sun beat down on us (first day without a jacket on!) my mind started to wander a bit, and I started thinking about beauty and how it just seems to be such a hard time for young girls to grow up in right now - constantly being bombarded by images of what "beauty" is and how to achieve it. I don't really know why I started thinking about it - perhaps it's because my husband works with youth and we often talk about what challenges young people face, perhaps because I was reading an article the other day about something related to that, or perhaps because God put it on my heart for a reason.<br />
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I started thinking about how I've faced my own struggles and insecurities over the years as it relates to beauty - what I think it is, what it means to be or not be known as physically beautiful, and what "inner beauty" really means.<br />
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I was very fortunate growing up. My family never placed a lot of importance on physical beauty. I went through a very awkward phase (I mean <em>really</em> awkward) from the time I was about 11 to probably around 18. Yup - it was a pretty long phase. From a purely physical standpoint, I wasn't someone society would have described as beautiful. I had really frizzy hair (which for some reason I cut short, thinking that would "calm" the frizz. Ha! It only makes it worse people!) I also had a huge space between my front teeth, which was to be straightened by retainers, braces and "head gear" (yes, the kind that wraps around your whole head . . . ) I also had acne, and was super, super, super skinny. Although I ate like a horse, I just had extremely high metabolism and couldn't gain weight for the life of me. Let's put it this way - until I was 18 I pretty much looked like a very skinny, frizzy, short-haired guy. <br />
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But here's the thing though - I don't think I realized any of that at the time. As looks weren't really emphasized in my family or in my circle of friends, it never really dawned on me that I wasn't "physically beautiful". Sure there were some mean kids at school who teased me from time to time, and sure there was that one time some lady stopped me at the mailbox to ask if I was a boy or a girl <em>(seriously)</em> and I ran home crying, but it honestly never really bothered me that much. My parents were great at always making sure that it was personality traits or qualities we had to work at that were recognized. If I studied really hard and did well on a test? I was praised for it. When my parents found out I had stood up to a bully who was teasing a special needs boy on the bus and then walked him home? I saw tears in their eyes as they told me how proud they were of me. I knew even at that young age, that when I was applauded or praised, it was due to something that really mattered - that was a reflection of who I really <em>was</em>.<br />
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It was only when I was around 18/19 years old that I started to place a lot more significance on my own physical appearance. I would look back at photographs of myself during that awkward phase and be ashamed at how I had looked. I remember getting really upset one day as I looked through older photos of myself - holding one up to my dad & saying - "Why didn't you guys tell me I looked so bad? Why didn't you tell me I was ugly!" And he simply looked at me and said "But you weren't. You were beautiful then just as you're beautiful now." I scoffed at it and continued into what I call the "hair straightening years". I started putting a lot more time and effort into how I looked, and started to place <em>way</em> too much importance on physical beauty. I would wake up early everyday - hours earlier then I had to - just to straighten my long unruly, super-light dyed blonde hair, and then spend probably about a half hour applying make-up and picking out the right clothes. I also became a little obsessed with working out - I would go running or exercise for at least an hour everyday, on top of multiple dance classes a week. The clothes I would pick out were picked out to accentuate my figure, and although I wasn't overly provocative in my clothing, I do admit I was looking for clothes that would be considered "sexy" to the opposite sex and show off how fit and toned I was.<br />
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It's hard to pin point exactly why that "hair straightening" phase started, although I'm sure a lot of it probably had to do with the fact that I had started to grow into my features more, and was for the first time in my life getting attention from guys. People other than family members and friends started referring to me as "pretty" or "cute" and even "beautiful" and as a young woman that can definitely affect you. It made me feel good, and made me feel valued. Why would someone calling me "pretty" make me feel more valued than someone calling me "smart"? Probably because then (as well as now), physical beauty seems to unfortunately hold more weight on the scale than many other attributes when it comes to weighing someones "value". Everywhere we look we are being bombarded by physical beauty. Even those companies that are trying to be more realistic in their advertising campaigns by using models who are of average weight and proportions, are still tending to use "models" who have what we would still consider "beautiful" facial features. <br />
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The hair straightening years lasted for awhile. It wasn't until I met the man who would become my husband, and started to see myself through his eyes, that I started to settle into a more permanent place of self-worth. When I truly started to realize that he loved the "real" no make-up, t-shirts and jeans me - just as much as the straight hair, made-up, tight skirt and top me - I really started to return to that place I lived in from 11-18. A place where looks aren't equal to worth -where your outward self is not indicative to your inner qualities - which are the qualities that hold the most weight. This was also happening at a time where I started to come back to my faith, and I not only started to see myself through my husband's eyes but through the eyes of God, as a child of God. That message of inner beauty and the strength of that continued to triumph over the message of society I had been succumbing to for so long.<br />
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I'm not saying I'm now so wise that I never care about how I look, or go through phases where I think I'm "fat" or "ugly". I'm human, and thus I am flawed. It's hard to not let the media's image of beauty impede on what I know is the true image. It's hard to watch TV, or a movie, or flip through a magazine and not start to think "man I really need to lose some more weight", or "I really need to buy some anti-wrinkle cream - those laugh lines are getting a little more noticeable!". It's hard. It's really hard. But when you are surrounded by people who not only see what's truly important, it makes it so much easier to push past that, take a breath, and remember what's really important. Outward, physical beauty is fleeting. It may get you attention, it may make you feel valued or important for awhile, but it doesn't last. Although we can admire physical beauty in a person - it isn't often those fleeting qualities that people remember about you. People remember kindness. They remember warmth. They remember how you made them feel about themselves. They may remember that you looked nice, they may remember that you had nice hair or beautiful eyes - but they'll probably remember more the warmth and spirit that shone out of your eyes, rather than what colour they were. They'll probably remember more that laughter often came out of your mouth, instead of whether or not your teeth were straight and shining white.<br />
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I should state somewhere in this post that I'm not saying we shouldn't pay any attention at all to our physical selves. I recognize that my body is a gift from God and should treat it accordingly. We should eat healthy, we should exercise, and if we want to wear a nice outfit and put on some make-up and do our hair - that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's not <em>unhealthy</em> to want to be healthy. It's not a bad thing if we want to get dressed up and look nice. It's when that starts to be an indicator of who we <em>are</em> and what we're <em>worth</em> that we need to worry about. If you feel better about yourself on the days you're all dolled up than you do on the no make-up, sweatpants kinda' days - well then you should maybe start to examine why you really feel that way. That's when you need to realize and remember that it is our inner qualities and spirit that is more important than our outward appearance. The Bible talks in several places about beauty, and I would definitely encourage you to search out those passages and do some study on what is in the Word itself about beauty. Remember that you (yes YOU) were created in the image of God. Do you get that? Do you understand that? Do you understand that you weren't a mistake? That not only whatever you look like on the outside is a masterpiece, but that God sees your heart and that's what is truly important?<br />
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As I walked down the path and had all this on my heart, Franklin and I reached one of the entrances to the forest. I was drawn closer to the trees, and we stood for several minutes taking in the scene. It was beautiful. Nature in it's finest. Not physically mind you. From all the rain and melted snow, there's now a massive swamp on the fringes of the forest, and it's not the most inviting for a walk. The trees still haven't yet really started to bloom, and it's muddy and brown and messy. What was most beautiful was the sound. It sounded like a mixture of frogs & crickets, singing out in what literally sounded like a symphony of nature. I know that sounds corny, but it's true. <br />
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It was as if God was driving the message home to me. "Do you hear that? I know what you see you don't think is "beautiful", but do you hear that? Do you hear that it is beautiful? Do you feel it's beauty? Now truly open your eyes and see that it IS beautiful. It is <em>MY</em> creation, and it is beauty. And you are beautiful as you are also my creation."<br />
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Remember that next time you look at yourself in the mirror and see only what you think are your flaws. Remember that the next time your inner dialogue is full of self-directed criticisms'. Try and see yourself for what you truly are. You are a CHILD OF GOD.<br />
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Marvellous. Perfect. Beautiful.<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-91943106942558258882013-02-19T15:34:00.000-05:002013-02-19T15:34:55.435-05:00On being creative . . .I'm a creative person. Always have been - probably always will be. I'm also an "ideas" person, and not always a "follow-through" kinda' person. Need an idea for a movie, song, or book? I'm your girl. Need a jingle, a name for your store, or thoughts on how to revamp your business to draw in more potential customers? I could probably give you several.<br />
But are those giftings any good if I can't see it through 'till the end? I've been thinking about this recently after I read an article about a writer who was in the same boat. He would come up with a bunch of great ideas for his next book, but then after working on it for a short while he would get distracted by other ideas he was coming up with that were "bigger and better" than the last. Needless to say, that writer still has yet to publish a book.<br />
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Is this something that most creative people struggle with? Does inspiration strike too frequently that we can't actually buckle down and get the work done? I sometimes find myself complaining "oh if I only had more time off I could focus more on my song-writing", or "if I could only get away for awhile I'd be able to get a bunch of my screenplay done". But of course, that's not the real issue is it? The issue is committing yourself to something and getting it done no matter what - even if you're tired or even if you have a million other things going on. I'm not being too hard on myself though - I do realize that everyone needs time off, and everyone needs to get away for awhile to recharge their batteries, and for those of us creative types to reharness our energies. But what I aspire to be is someone who brings the same focus and energy to their passions no matter where they are, and no matter what else they have going on in their lives. The great thinkers, innovators and creators of our time don't say "oh I have too much going on right now - I'll get back to that other stuff next week" - they make time for it.<br />
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So that's my current challenge to myself - to stay committed and energized to do the things I love to do, and to be my creative self - even when work is crazy, and there's a house to clean, and laundry to do, and people to see and places to go.<br />
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God doesn't bestow gifts among people for nothing, so if you're good at something, and if it's something that you feel, that you <em>know</em> is your "calling" in life - take that seriously. Don't brush it off as a "hobby" or something to do only when you "have time". Life is too short for such nonsense.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-42535789911736315322012-12-17T21:17:00.000-05:002012-12-17T21:17:54.647-05:00When we don't understandThe other day I left work after a long, tiring day. I stopped at the store on my way home to pick up a few things, and as I waited in the check-out line to pay, my mind kept replaying the day - what I had done, what I still had yet to do, and my body kept reminding me how tired it was. I'll admit I was in a bit of a "woe is me"mode.<br />
I paid for my things, got back in the car, and turned the radio on as I pulled out of the lot. That's when I heard the news for the first time - there had been a school shooting in Connecticut and some students had been killed. At that time, they didn't know much else, so with my heart starting to beat faster, I got home and turned the news on right away. The details of my day quickly left my mind as the details of the day in Newtown started to roll in, the disbelief starting to build.<br />
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What?<br />
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How?<br />
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Why?<br />
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I couldn't fathom that a shooter had gone to an elementary school. My heart just couldn't take it. 6 year olds? A kindergarten class? What? I don't understand!<br />
I know many of us are asking these same questions.<br />
I know many of us have the families and community of Newtown in our prayers.<br />
I know many of us have had this thought cross our minds - how could God let this happen? Where was He in all of this?<br />
I've seen lots of things on social media the last few days about this. I'm not going to pretend to be some sort of Biblical scholar who can make sense of all of this and comment on where God is when bad things happen. It wasn't all that long ago that I fully accepted Christ into my life, and I'm still learning. I don't know the answers, and I won't pretend that because I am a Christan I don't worry and I'm not afraid of the evil I see that is happening in our world.<br />
To be honest - I worry about us. I really do. It has kept me up some nights, and I wonder about our future as a society.<br />
I have no answers, I have nothing clever or wise to say.<br />
I am as confused as the next person.<br />
But I pray.<br />
And I confess my worries and fears to the One I know created me.<br />
I don't understand the world sometimes. But I trust Him.<br />
And I know that one day, I will be in Heaven, standing in front of the Alpha and the Omega. The First and the Last. The Beginning and the End.<br />
And there will be peace.<br />
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He has not left us.<br />
He has not forsaken us.<br />
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And so I pray.<br />
And will continue to pray.<br />
For every child whose life was taken away.<br />
For every parent whose grief is unimaginable.<br />
For everyone.<br />
For all of us.<br />
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He has not left us.<br />
He has not forsaken us.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-84298466343996454052012-12-11T23:35:00.003-05:002012-12-12T00:01:45.497-05:00What's old is new againAfter a year and a half since my last post here on this site, I have decided to relaunch this blog! I've been feeling the need to write lately, and although I had started up an actual website for myself awhile ago, for whatever reason I found I never wanted to blog on that site and it ended up kind of falling by the wayside. I always really enjoyed posting blogs on here though, so when the urge to blog started to strike again, I naturally started to entertain the idea of just relaunching "The Road Less Travelled".
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As I started to go about the business of updating some of the small details about this blog, I took the time to go back and read through some of the older entries. Wow - so fun and interesting to see what has changed and what has stayed the same! I couldn't even begin to recap everything that's happened in the last few years (and I'm sure you wouldn't want to read it all!) I will say that God has continued to do some amazing things in my heart, and is using me in ways I never could have imagined. I had a breakthrough in my faith journey this past January, and ever since then I have found myself even more fulfilled in His love than ever before, and hungry to continue following His calling on my life.
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I don't know what direction my blog posts are going to go at this point, but my hope and prayer will be that if you're reading them, you find them useful in some way - whether you can relate to them, learn something from them (or learn what <i>not</i> to do) or that you find my random musings at least somewhat entertaining.
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Here's to blogging!
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-74575789037704552142011-07-08T13:02:00.000-04:002011-07-08T14:33:43.487-04:00On growing upI have lawn furniture.<br /><br /><em>I</em> have <strong><em>lawn furniture </em></strong>. . .<br /><br />This struck me in a very profound way yesterday morning. <br /><br />I was in our backyard watering our hanging plants & contemplating the day ahead of me, when I noticed our patio set looked a little dusty and worse-for-wear. I decided to spray them down as well, and as I stood there washing off the table and chairs it struck me like a bolt of lightening.<br /><br />Say it with me here folks . . . <em>I have lawn furniture!!!!</em><br /><br />You know who has lawn furniture? Grown-ups have lawn furniture! People who pay taxes, go to community meetings, and know how to pick the best fruit at the grocery store - these are people who have lawn furniture! Stop the press people, major news coming in - Suzanne Judge is a full-fledged GROWN-UP!<br /><br />In all seriousness, I honestly don't know why it was my patio set in particular that led me to this most profound of insights, and not something that actually seems more "grown-up" (like my house, my car, my collection of rare antique books, or my line of credit). Maybe it was the thought that the lovely table, umbrella and chairs that adorn my backyard are not something a whipper-snapper "young person" would automatically think to go out and buy. Think about it - when you first get set "loose" into the world, with school behind you and the whole world as your oyster, the things you think and dream about spending your money on are probably a little bit more exciting than a chaise lounge. Only those of us who have crossed the line into full adulthood actually devote significant brain time to plotting out which new chair pads would go best with the existing table umbrella, and whether or not to add more patio stones to maximize space, or rip some out to put more grass seed in. <br /><br />Whatever the reason - this time, in this circumstance, it really got to me. Not in a bad way, mind you - I like being out of the craziness of the teenage years, and the sense of unknown of my twenties. I think it was more the thought that I spent most of my childhood wishing I was older, just counting down the years until I could have my freedom, earn my own money (<em>ha! if I only knew - youth really is wasted on the young isn't it)</em>, and make my own decisions. Suddenly you look up and you're actually there - a grown-up - and it's almost like a slap in the face, realizing that now you actually do have complete freedom to do whatever you want to do, but along with that comes the responsibility and actualization of earning your own money and deciding for yourself who you will be and what encompasses your life.<br /><br />Outside of the law, no one can tell me what to do. Sounds kind of badass doesn't it? But it's not really, it's almost sad in a way. Yes I have a family and I do base most of my decisions on what would be best for my family, but at the core of being adult is this running theme that <strong>you. decide. for. yourself.</strong> People can give you all sorts of advice (and they do), but at the end of day it really is up to <em>you and you alone </em>to make decisions, and have those decisions go on to shape your life. I think perhaps a lot of "adults" who have major problems going on in their lives simply haven't "grown-up" yet - they keep waiting for someone to tell them what to do and where to go. They haven't realized yet that they are in control of their own lives.<br /><br />I remember thinking when I was about 8 years old, that when I was grown-up and living on my own I would eat cookies all day long and paint sky murals on all the walls and ceilings. I certainly could now that I am a grown-up - no one could really stop me from sitting down with a package full of cookies or from cracking open some paint cans. But while I do still love me some cookies (especially chocolate chip), the thought now of eating cookies all day long kinda' makes me sick to my stomach, and I now prefer a more neutral colour-palette on my walls (and ceilings).<br /><br />I hope to have many years left in my adult life, and I do realize that ten, twenty, thirty or forty years from now I'll probably look back and realize that I really didn't know anything at all at the ripe 'ole age of 31. I hope to be someone who continually evolves and grows into the person she knows she can be. And I hope and pray that as I continue to delve into this world of being a grown-up, I remember that the power to decide for yourself is in fact a great responsibility, not just to yourself but to everyone around you. Because we all have an impact on everything else, and <em><strong>deciding for yourself doesn't equal living for yourself</strong></em>. I think we could all agree that none of us were made to sit around and eat cookies all day long.<br /><br /><br /><em>P.S. If my lawn furniture spawned this train of thought for me, can you imagine what it's going to be like if I ever have something that really encompasses grown-up responsibility? Like say . . . children? <br /><br />Holy smokes . . .</em>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-7539336183835919522011-06-30T13:48:00.001-04:002011-06-30T13:48:11.412-04:00Well-deserved time offWell I survived my 8-day stretch of work days, and right now I'm on #2 of 3 days off in a row. I've totally been a lazy slob for the last day and a half too - but I don't feel guilty about it at all - I deserve it, right?<br /><br />I was thinking that today was going to be a productive day, and I'd at least get caught up on some cleaning and laundry . . . well, that remains to be seen, as it's already halfway through the day and all I've managed to do so far is play on my iPad - download some apps, browse through my new flipboard (so awesome - best iPad app ever!), and figure out how to link my little 'ole blog here to my twitter feed and Facebook wall. Yup - aren't you impressed? I'm turning into such a little social media butterfly, aren't I? Have to admit that my temporary disappointment in the iPad was probably strictly due to my lack of knowledge on how to use it to it's full potential!<br /><br />Anyhoo - what else has been goin' on the last little while? Hmmm - we officially booked our summer vacay, and I'm super stoked about that. We'll be spending a week and a bit on the coast of Maine (we booked a cute little cottage on an island - on a cliff overlooking the ocean). So excited about waking up and falling asleep to the sound of waves crashing along the shoreline! I'm counting down the days! I've also been working more on some music, and a new writing project I just started (it's a screenplay!). Writing a screenplay has been on my bucket list for about 15 years now, and my best screenplay idea yet came to me in a flash about 3 weeks ago while I was having dinner with Chris. He thinks it's a pretty awesome idea too, so that's something else I've started (which I will definitely finish, even though I know it's probably gonna' take awhile!). Finally, I've been trying to motivate myself to start exercising regularly - this is the hardest part! For someone who used to be really physically active, it's actually been really surprising to me how hard it is to stay motivated. You'd think it being bikini season and all that I'd be working out at least every other day, but I find it soooo hard to actually get my butt in gear and do it! Frustrating! So if anyone reading this has any tips for me on how to stay motivated and amped up to work out regularly - let me know 'cause I could definitely use some help in this area!<br /><br />Okay, enough rambling from me for now. Now gotta post this and see if my attempts earlier to link everything to, well, everything else on my home on the 'net has worked. 'Till later!<br /><br /><br />- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-65762350440792795362011-06-22T21:46:00.000-04:002011-06-22T21:52:21.669-04:00Another Week, Another Cover!Here's the 2nd cover up on my new youtube page. It's a song I love, love, <em>love</em> (can 'ya tell I like it a wee bit?) by Natalie Grant, called "Safe".<br /><br /><br /><object width="520" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/elJ9bw1bj7I?version=3&hl=en_US&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/elJ9bw1bj7I?version=3&hl=en_US&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="520" height="340" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-49095594404516763512011-06-15T02:02:00.000-04:002011-06-15T02:08:06.298-04:00New Youtube channelHi all!<br /><br />So I've got my first cover song up on the new youtube channel (www.youtube.com/suzannejudgemusic). <br /><br />It's a cover I did last week of Hillsong's "His Glory Appears". Love, love, love the lyrics and the simple melody - hope it touches your heart like it did mine!<br /><br />I should have some more stuff posted on there soon - I'm trying to keep my promise of updating and uploading content more frequently - so far so good!!<br /><br />;)<br /><br /><br /><br /><object width="520" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/SPtLExWiyNM?version=3&hl=en_US&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/SPtLExWiyNM?version=3&hl=en_US&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="520" height="340" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-37787083320930341702011-05-30T17:27:00.001-04:002011-05-30T17:40:20.118-04:00It's been a loooong time . . . again!Haha - so turns out I'm not doing so great at keepin' this blog updated, am I? <br /><br />;)<br /><br />I think my excuse will be simply that I must be aging, therefore time is going by much faster than it ever has and I just don't have the time to blog?!<br /><br />In all seriousness, I really can't even begin to wrap my brain around the fact that in a few days it'll be June - where in the world did the time go? I'm actually quite glad that we're getting into summer though - I'm definitely ready for some sun, and fun, and beach, and just lot's of great warm-weather adventures!<br /><br />Life has been busy these last few months - always feel like there's lots going on and not enough time in the day to get everything and everyone in there! Work's been getting busier for me, as I've continued to grow into my role there and take on more projects and responsibilities - still feel like it's a good fit for me there, so that's been nice.<br /><br />Hubby's been keepin' busy with church and youth group stuff - I've started singing at some of the morning services at church which has been both really great and really inspiring as I've continued to delve into the world of worship music and God-focused songwriting. It's definitely allowed me to focus in more on what kind of music I really should be writing and feel called to write. Hopefully I'll finally (finally!!!!) have some stuff to share soon! I've actually started a new youtube channel for myself (youtube.com/suzannejudgemusic). Nothing on there yet, but I'll be uploading content soon (I promise!) I wanted a new channel to post covers and originals which more reflect we're I'm going right now music and genre-wise, so check it out in a little bit if you feel so inclined!<br /><br />Both Chris and myself have had "Adventure" and "Travel" and "Africa" on the mind lately - probably doesn't help that I've been rewatching Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman's "Long Way Down" tv series on DVD and pouring over all my pictures and videos. We're hoping to get back to Uganda next March, as Ryan from GIVE International has asked us to lead a high school group there over their March Break. They're waiting on approval from their school board, so we should find out by June 10th if the trip is a go - keep your fingers crossed for us!! We actually got a call in the middle of the night last night from a friend in Uganda, which was kind of funny (considering we'd both spent all night saying how much we missed it and wanted to go back soon). I also have a huge desire to travel to some other African countries soon, so we'll see how everything comes into play.<br /><br />I've already begun counting down the days until our summer vacation/trip. We'll be spending some time down at the "farm" with the entire Brimley clan for a bit, and then Chris and I are heading to the Adirondacks for a week-long mountainous adventure! There will definitely be some hiking, swimming, kayaking and (hopefully) relaxing in there, so I'm excited about that and to get away to somewhere I've never been before and get back to "nature" as it were. I'm determined to take full advantage of the summer and nice weather this season, and not let it pass me by!<br /><br />Alright, well that's it for this post - I'm off for the rest of the day and have a song I'm trying to finish, so bye for now! (And I'll definitely try to keep this sucker more up-to-date from now on!)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-64487695450448496592011-04-04T23:39:00.000-04:002011-04-04T23:59:44.456-04:00It's been a looong time . . .Can't believe my last post was on February 1st and it's now April! I don't even know where to begin to fill everyone in on what's been happening in my life since then, so to make it easy I'll do it the lazy way and do some really generalized "bullet-point" notes! Here goes:<br /><br />- Spent the first half of February getting settled in at the new house and work<br /><br />- Spent the last half of February feeling the worst I've ever felt in my life, with a couple of days and nights in and out of the hospital (it was kidney stones - woo hoo!)<br /><br />- March was the start of our new church life, which has been super awesome and inspiring and encouraging<br /><br />- end of March was my birthday!<br /><br />- this last weekend was spent in Niagara Falls on a mini-retreat with the student leaders from our church youth group<br /><br />So there's your quick recap of my life for the past two months! I've been meaning to get on here to post again for a few weeks now, but I'm still trying to get into the swing of things here and figuring out how to balance work, home life, church and music.<br /><br />Speaking of music - I've been feeling super inspired and re-energized lately with my music projects and have been looking ahead at what my short and long-term goals are with my music over the next months and years. I've recently begun to branch out and have started dipping my toes into the world of worship music, which has been a <em>huge</em> source of inspiration for me lately - so I'm excited about that and ready to see where God will lead me and how I've meant to use my talents in that area. I'm also working on a really special song for a cause that's been on my mind a lot lately, so hopefully I'll have that ready to share in a week or so!<br /><br />Anyhoo - I'm going to be posting regularly again, so pop by every once in awhile and I promise I'll try and keep you entertained!<br /><br />:) SuzAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-17851124447312278112011-02-01T17:34:00.000-05:002011-02-01T17:47:36.913-05:00A new life!I know it's been awhile since my last post - it's been crazy the last few weeks with the move, getting unpacked, and getting started at the new store. I've had the last two days off, and it's been the first time since before we moved where I actually felt like I had some downtime and could truly relax a little bit!<br />I'm <em>loving</em> our new house - while it's definitely smaller (we're now in a townhouse), I love the layout and the colours and I'm especially lovin' our gas fireplace and having my own bathroom! Every room in our new house is usable and liveable space, which I love as I've never understood why some houses or families have rooms that don't actually get lived in. I'm finally getting my office/recording studio set up, and it's definitely all starting to feel like home. Franklin made the move really easily and seemed to be at home about 10 minutes after trotting in the front door!<br /><br />My new store is awesome too - it's very different from my old location - definitely a lot calmer and I feel the atmosphere suits me and my personality a lot more. The commute has been pretty great too - it's pretty much 15 minutes from my driveway to the store parking lot. I'm going against traffic, so that's been a blessing, although we'll see how it is tomorrow in the big snow storm!!<br /><br />Chris starts at the new church in March, so it really does feel like a new beginning for us in many ways. I'm really thankful for the change of pace and am excited for what's in store for us in the next year. I already feel like I'm going to have a lot more time to work on my music, and Chris and I have been talking about where I want to go with my website and youtube page, etc.<br /><br />So . . . so far so good! 2011 has definitely been off to a busy start in many ways, but now that the boxes are unpacked (well, most of them) and routines are being established, it's becoming even more clear to me that everything does happen for a reason and we were brought back here for a purpose!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-66501416331803294822011-01-08T21:20:00.000-05:002011-01-08T21:33:05.459-05:00Changes, changes . . .In my last post I mentioned that there were some changes coming up for me shortly . . . <br /><br />In the ever-changing tradition of the Judges, we are moving again!<br /><br />We are moving back to the Mississauga area, and I am transferring to another store in that area! It was time for a change, and we're excited about new beginnings and about being back in an area that always felt like home to us.<br /><br />The big move is coming up very shortly, and I've been frantically trying to pack up the house and tie up all my loose ends at work. The timing with the new store worked out perfectly, and I start there right after we move, so I don't have to make the commute from Mississauga to North York at all, which I'm really thankful for.<br /><br />I'm excited about being back in a community I know and love, and I'm also really excited about being closer to family and some old friends of mine.<br /><br />So New Year means new home <em>and</em> new store for me! I think this year is going to be a great one, full of other changes, possibilites and dreams coming true!!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-37420829369702781342011-01-01T13:08:00.000-05:002011-01-01T13:33:13.910-05:00Happy New Year!January 1, 2011<br /><br />Wow - seems so strange to write that!<br /><br />It feels like only a few months ago when I was writing my New Year's post for 2010, it's crazy to realize that it's actually been <em>12 whole months </em>- it went by in such a blur!<br /><br />So many things happened in my life in 2010, there were lot's of good times, but also some hard, pretty bad times. I made it through though, and am grateful for everything and all the leasons learned. <br /><br />Significant things/moments of 2010:<br /><br /><br />- I travelled to Africa again and got to spend time doing work in both Uganda and Kenya and connect with people I really care about<br /><br />- I got to go to The Bahamas with Chris for some much needed rest and relaxation<br /><br />- I turned 30<br /><br />- my father-in-law Stanley passed away after an extended stay in the hospital<br /><br />- my sister got pregnant<br /><br />- I learned (finally) how to play guitar<br /><br />- I ran my first 10k race<br /><br /><br />There were a lot of other important moments throughout the year, and a lot of smaller "normal", "run of the mill" moments that filled me with happiness and gratefullness and were often the ones I remember most fondly. <br /><br />Looking forward to the next year, I hope that it's full of both small and big moments, and that I'm wise enough to recognize them while they're happening. I know that there are some big changes coming up very soon (which I'll be posting about in the next few days), and I'm really excited about what the next 12 months will bring.<br /><br />Here's to 2010, and here's to the journey that awaits us all in 2011!!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-7088038367368993412010-12-29T11:32:00.000-05:002010-12-29T13:44:40.878-05:00I survived!Well, I did it! <br /><br />I survived Christmas! <br /><br />It was quite stressful this year (not the actually Holiday itself - that was pretty great), but the lead-up to it seemed to be "a lot" this year. Working as a retail manager over the Holiday season is always stressful and nerve-racking, but it's finally over now, and pretty soon it'll be my fave holiday of the year - New Year's!<br /><br />I got to see my family over Christmas, and saw my sweet little niece Claire again (who is already speaking in full sentences at only 19 months!). I had two great days off with the fam, and then it was back to work for boxing day. I'm off now for two days though with my hubby, so we're planning on just hanging out and taking it easy. I also seem to have caught the cold that's been going around at work, so I'm glad I have a chance now to just relax and recouperate for a few days.<br /><br />Hope everyone out there had a great Holiday with their loved ones, and that the New Year brings about a great start to 2011!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-21484957399160360042010-12-03T18:25:00.000-05:002010-12-03T18:41:34.311-05:00Another reason I love my husband . . .So as you probably know by now, I am a bit of a Taylor Swift fan - not a crazy fan or anything, I just love her songwriting and the honesty that comes out in her lyrics. The songwriter in me also thinks it's pretty cool to have a young artist be really popular nowadays who not only writes their own songs, but seems to be a good role model for young girls as well. She isn't famous for her partying, or her scandals - she's famous for her songs, and I love that.<br /><br />Well she's coming back to Toronto next summer for her "Speak Now" tour, and tickets went on sale today, and . . . guess whose hubby went online and got a ticket for her today?!!!<br /><br />That's right - I'll be a proud t-swift concert attendee next July! (And it's a pretty good seat too!) I've attached a video of one of her new songs "Haunted", that was on a TV special the other week: <br /><br /><br /><object width="520" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/92isX62fv1g?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/92isX62fv1g?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="520" height="340"></embed></object>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-70826567643149999072010-11-22T19:25:00.000-05:002010-11-22T19:51:47.573-05:00Harry Potter!!!!"Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1" came out in theatres last week and I finally had a chance to go see it today on my day off. <br /><br />Absolutely AMAZING!!!! Even my husband (who very nicely came along with me) thought it was really good! I've been looking forward to this film for a <em>very</em> long time, and it definitely didn't disappoint. The acting was great, pacing was perfect, and the things the filmmakers chose to focus on was spot-on. I'm both really excited and really kinda' sad for Part 2 to come out next summer. I can't believe that soon Harry Potter will really be <em>over</em>! It was one thing when the final book came out, but we all new that we still had a few films to go, so it wasn't too bad. But now with only one to go, it's hard to wrap my brain around the fact that after next July there will be nothing HP-related to get excited about! I guess a trip to "The Wizarding World of Harry Potter Themepark" will have to be in order? <br /><br /><br /><object width="520" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/_EC2tmFVNNE?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/_EC2tmFVNNE?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="520" height="340"></embed></object>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2614440787114438524.post-33563149998431494332010-11-04T20:25:00.000-04:002010-11-04T20:29:40.372-04:00How did I get so lucky?Every day there's at least one moment <em>(at least)</em>, where I wonder how in the world I got so lucky that I get to have Chris as my husband.<br /><br />How in the world could I be so blessed to have someone like him in my life?<br /><br />I love you babe . . .Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05939358735141282564noreply@blogger.com1